For Better or Worse...

I was married June 23, 1990.  I was 18 and ready to conquer all the negativity that follow a young couple getting married with no college degree and on my side, no family support.  For the first 5 years things went well, typical problems, demands and struggles of newlyweds.  To add to this, I became pregnant 6 months after I was married and had my first daughter at 20. 

Then the bigger struggles and trials bombarded our marriage.  I suffered from postpartum depression shortly after my daughter was born. Then a few years later my husband began working 2nd shift, which allowed us little time together.  Our relationship slowly became strained and we began drifting apart. 

Then on September 15, 2001, my then 9 year old daughter became very ill.  It started as what appeared to be a stomach bug, but then she couldn't keep her head up and she wasn't getting better.  After two Doctor visits and two trips to the hospital, my daugher was admitted to St. Christopher's Hospital with a brain hemorrhage and also suffered a mini-stroke.  They had no idea what was wrong with her and I was left terrified for my little girl's future.  To add to this stress, I was pregnant with my 2nd child.  I was always a worrier and this incident pushed me over the edge.  I wouldn't leave my little girls side, I stopped eating, drinking.  All I wanted was answers and to know what the future held for my daughter.  The answers didn't come until December 2002.  Due to all the stress of my daughter's illness, I developed a hematoma that threatened the life of my unborn child.  I was put on bed rest and once again filled with questions and worry about both of my girls.  My daughter came home from the hospital just in time to celebrate her 10th Birthday, she was restricted to no physical activity until we had some answers. So I laid awake most nights alone, while my husband worked, staring at her, hoping she would wake up the next morning. 

It was during this time I began attending a church looking to God for answers, hope, reassurance, something. 

To be Continued...